Skip to main content

On Comparison: What Reliance isn't seeing.

 So what is it?
RELIANCE: I've not been feeling so fine lately. My health has been deteriorating without mercy. Of recent, I've had to visit the hospital twice for tests, to reassure myself that I'm not actually a sickler.
VALERIE: Okayyyy...your OCD won this time around.
RELIANCE: Stop it. You would have done the same if you were in my shoes.
VALERIE: Oya now, no vex ma.
RELIANCE: See ehn, that is not even my issue. So many things have been on my mind lately.
VALERIE: (Sitting up) Hmmmm...Do you mind sharing?
RELIANCE: Not really. Errhm...do you remember Ola? The girl we used to call smallie dah year?
VALERIE: (Thinking aloud) Smallie...Ola...who...wait, wait, the one from our secondary school?
RELIANCE: Ehen!( claps her hand)...I saw her.
VALERIE: (Brightens up her eyes, and begins to smile) Oh my God..where? How was she looking? Where does she live?
RELIANCE: Calm down madam...abi, I should leave you to do the talking?
VALERIE: Sorry oo..Oya, I'm all ears ma.
RELIANCE: Better. So, I was just coming out of the banking hall on Thursday morning, when I saw this car entering into the bank compound. I don't know if you would understand me oo, but there are some vehicles, that from the time you see them, till they leave your sight, you just can't ignore. Especially if you have this thing for cars like me.
VALERIE: I fully understand. I've seen you lost while staring many a times.
RELIANCE: (Smiling) That's how I saw this vehicle that almost made me miss my steps ooh. Mehn...it was just so adorable and powerful-looking. I don't know why I didn't get the name( hits her forehead). Then when this vehicle came quite close to me, it just stopped. I couldn't really see who was inside, because the glasses were slightly tinted,  so I made to start going. Then the door opened, and guess who came out?
VALERIE: Who were we talking about?...Olami?
RELIANCE: Haeeeewwwww.. Valerie, you need to see the glow. The babe was sparkling all over( smiling and demonstrating). I was just too dumbfounded and lost. Like  the Olami I know???. She was the one who even pulled me into a bear hug, and kept screaming my name.

VALERIE: ( Makes a baby face) Awwwnn....so sweet.
RELIANCE: Azinnn..the girl has even added in height, and weight seff. We chatted for a while, exchanged contacts, and then parted ways.
VALERIE: Beautiful reunion, chei!(raises her eyebrows) But, wait. Is this what has been on your mind ever since?
RELIANCE: You will not be calming down now.. Valerie, what position did Olami used to be in class that year?
VALERIE: Bottom five. Everyone knows.
RELIANCE: Thank you. What about me?
VALERIE: We were all following you humbly at the back now..
RELIANCE: See? That's my painnnn ( hits her forehead). The moment Olami stepped out of that vehicle, even though I was smiling and happy with her, the truth is, I was completely lost in thoughts. I was full of questions. God knows I left there in tears that day. Tears of Joy for her, and tears of sorrow for myself.
VALERIE: Okay wait, you have to go easy on yourself..
RELIANCE: (Cuts in sharply) That's not all oo... that's not all. See( she reaches for her handbag, and brings out an envelope)... it's my younger sister's wedding invite I came here to give to  you. Like this girl would be wedding in a month's time. And me?? No potential suitor to even use and have hope. Or is it the health issue I was telling you about? Just compare it to you. Like, I'm not sure you've even had any reason to visit a pharmacy in this month, not to talk of a hospital. But if I tell you how much I move in and out of the hospital, without any reasonable answer to show for it. See ehn, the thing is, generally, I just feel like life has been really unfair to me.

VALERIE: Wow. This is a mouthful. Breathe now girl.... I've heard all you said. But, here's the deal.
             Most times, we just have to learn to be grateful, because life is not the way we see it. Think of it like, we all are carrying our personal life details in an opaque bottle. Apart from the side one may decide to show you, or the clue you may get through close observation, the rest are unknown to us. Are you aware that this Olami of a girl was diagnosed sometime in secondary school of a terminal disease? Or have you forgotten she didn't finish with us? I used to be close to her, so I learnt about this sometime later. Her parents had to take her out of the country for treatment when the whole issue started, and the disease was managed to a manageable extent. And yes, she returned sometime ago, but believe you me, she has a very limited time to live.
RELIANCE: (With eyes wide open) Oh my God!.. Are you serious?
VALERIE: Yes I am, dear. Okay, think about your sister who is about to get married?. You should know better than me now, so do the maths. Has she always been as privileged as you are? Or have you forgotten that she couldn't go to school, while you rocked all levels of education with brimming favour? Then as for my health, let's just leave the talk for another day. But just bear in mind, that it's not everyone who looks fine facially, that is fine within.
               And errhm, hear me girl, this is not to rule out perfectionism. Some persons still get tons of blessings with no conditions attached. Some persons are just graced in all aspects. That is fine, but doesn't happen so often.
        Truth is, if we are in any way, given an opportunity  to witness the behind the scenes of life's drama, and then we are able to have a  glimpse and see the prices of some blessings in the life of people, we would be more grateful for our own lives. As someone somewhere keeps saying; life is balanced, it's just you who is not standing well. Maybe you might consider adjusting your standing position, so you be able to weigh without bias.
         Here's my 2 dollars for you, baby. If you're not analysing the life of someone for a project topic, or research, please leave it out of your mind. If you've always found pleasure in the comparison of your life, and that of someone else, please try out another hobby. There is so much we're not seeing. Plus, everyone is not entitled to a common time frame in life. We are all running in different lanes. Leave comparison out of your mind friend. You deserve your inner peace and more💜.








Comments

  1. Beautiful!!! This hit me hard. Gratitude is a must. I'll shift comparison outta my life. Thank you for this wonderful story🌹

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hmm. Leave comparison out of your mind. "I" deserve "my" peace and joy.
    Great work girl. Your pen is golden.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Need of the hour for me... I will try my best to do away with comparison...Thanks a bunch dearie... very nice and inspiring right up...You're going places... keep being you ☺️

    ReplyDelete
  4. Wow This is awesome. We need to be greatful to God at all times and we should learn not to compare our lives to others 😁😁. More grease to your elbow sis

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Other posts from this blog

How do you see humble beginnings??

             Frame It!!!....The best days are close already.           One day in my life, a long time after I had left secondary school, I was going through my school box, and lazily looking through all the last set of books I used during secondary school. Then I stumbled upon them. My different Journals and letters. The letters included those that were written to me, and those I failed to give out, due to lack of courage or any other reason. Boom! I sat down there and began to read. I've always loved reminiscence and reading with all my heart. So, I seamlessly spent quite sometime on that spot, reading those stuff, and trust me, I had a swell time. I laughed so hard, and I pinched myself at  different times. I am sure, you can guess the reason by now. Damn!...I felt stupefied and really surprised. For the letters I wrote, I kept on asking no one in particular..."Did I ever draft this?", "Like, Who does this? For those I received, I also asked myself.."Did I

Negative thoughts and you.

             First it is worry, then it turns to doubt....                Some days ago, I had an issue with someone. It was not a fall out, or anything big actually, just one of these harsh statements by individuals, that pierce through and through, and make you wonder if some things are actually  worth the stress. So, almost immediately after that took place, I began to worry so deeply. I was almost drifting off..., but then I remembered something. Something which made me stop dead in my tracks to depression. My mind went to something, and I realized that I had almost crossed the boundary. I realized I was going to be doubting my abilities soonest, so, like a reflex, I took the necessary actions. In no time, my joy was back, and all of those thoughts discarded😊.          Most of us are familiar with Dunsin Oyekan's song that says..." first it was fragrance, then it turned to fire. My worship is my weapon.."  .How about we rephrase it this way concerning our thought

Keys To A Happy Life

                           Let's talk, friend... What really do you plan to use all of those compliments which you've bottled up within yourself to do??. Let me guess...maybe save them all up till you're able to buy a fortune with it? Funny, right??..But this bothers me pretty much, so you have to tell me please. We'll come back to this later though, let us just not begin as enemies.            We would be learning about  keys to a happy life, today. I  garnered my information from a few personal encounters with persons, and my own application to life. Therefore, this list would not be exhaustive, but they're sure effective. Choke with Love:   Have you ever been stuck in a very tight corner with affection that the next air you sought to breathe was freedom? To me, and some others out there, that's one of the best feelings. I understand so well if you do not like it.. I've seen a lot of your type. Though it baffles me at how much I could love something

About this blog.

                      LET'S BEGIN WITH THIS!!            Hi  dear...How have you been?Trust you've been great?         Thank you for agreeing to walk down this path with me.  It's all the reason I'm happy you're here. I mean...who doesn't like company??             That trashed, let's look the way of the blog. What is it all about? Why did I decide to write? For fun, education, information, communication, or what have you?..You can guess all day long, but let me save you the stress. My purpose of owning a blog, cuts across all those purposes I earlier mentioned, and more. Sounds like a brag,right?...Okay, let me cool you down with this...you are the main  reason why I am blogging today. Trust me if you were not there, I wouldn't dare. I'm writing just for you!💝            Let me not spill the whole beans here...we'll do that as we communicate gradually. You'll come back, right? Promise me☺..Alright then, thank you so much. It's 12:

WE ARE STILL HUMANS.

         Just before you carry out that action..                 The moderator  rolled in the announcements, and this was among. The third meeting in three weeks, was mentioned. Where the pastors would go and discuss redundant stuff that could wait, or be finalized on phone. But as usual, the senior pastor would hear none of that. He actually holds such meetings in high esteem, and sees anyone's failure to come, as disobedience.                Having  that realization hit him once more,and remembering that he was stuck, the junior pastor cried out in my front. Yeah...he blurted out:"It's still the same things we are going there to discuss"... and I'm quite tired and hungry😥. He just wished for a way to escape but there was none. The moderator would not even take his message, not to talk of relaying it to the senior pastor.                 That was when I felt it. I mean, this junior pastor is my friend, and he was not carnal or whatever. Truth be told, if you

Expectations, then...disappointments.

MITIGATING THE HURTS THAT COMES WITH DISAPPOINTMENT.                   Friend, welcome again 🥰.              Sometime  ago, I got a new phone, and as usual, it came with a charger. Because this phone was a higher brand than all those I've used before, coupled with all the rants I heard about  the extra power that comes with follow come chargers😂, I protected this phone's charger with an utmost care. To be honest, left to me, I would not have loved to share this charger with anyone, but normally, as the Nigerians that we are, someone somewhere just had to beg you😔🤦. Sometimes, they could even use it in your absence if kept carelessly. So, somehow I still shared. All the same, I still took very good care of that charger, such that even as I shared, my heart went out with it.          Then one day...this beloved charger just stopped responding. Just like that. I mean an abrupt end. No warning signals,no symptoms, no real fault on my part. It just gave up on me down there in th

For today only.

Friend!...Happy new month to you🤗.  Trust you have been good. Well, I am writing to you today about something on my mind.  Do you ever feel like you have gotten past the point of making wrong decisions in a certain area of your life, and then boom, just one day after you have certified yourself, you make a major disastrous decision?  I am with you on this one😩.  Here is the thing. Up until yesterday, I still did things which I am not proud of today. And yes, if you check it out, you will discover it is the same with you. One moment, you think you have a grip over everything, and the next moment, you are losing it all helplessly.  The truth is, you have very limited control. Limited foresight too. So, despite everything, you can only be so careful, you cannot be so certain.  And that is what gives birth to this message: Do not, in a bid to avoid stepping on stones, refuse to walk.  Do not decide not to explore, just because you are scared. Do not leave out moments because you are scar

The Limit of your Goodness.

            TILL YOUR SHADOWS STOP SHOWING UP...            I too, face this issue everytime…Fredrick has been getting on my nerves lately. His own was now too much. All I badly craved now was to pour venom on him..through words, or even literally. Rebecca is nothing close to grateful, and never takes note of any good I do, and I just want to scream my  grievance into her face one day, and stop myself from doing good anywhere around her.                  And then I keep asking,"when do I stop  being good?, When is the right time to strike these persons with the fact that I also have a bad side, and I’m not made with goodness all around? Which time is the best for revenge or total back-off?.             Well then, here's the answer you may not want to hear, but need..." Till   your shadows stop showing up ".☺️               What did you hear about shadows??..You ever heard they never showed up in a day??. Nahh... It's you who never went out. Shadows are l

Keeping the You alive.

                             Flowers, green grasses, and small clusters everywhere. It's an animal kingdom. A goat meets a fish, and they become friends. They come together, and discover their variances, as regards their way of living, habitat and all. Then one day, the goat begins to tell the fish, that if they must remain friends, the fish has to leave its own habitat, and come stay with the goat on land. What  do you think would happen if the fish, which is cut out to live in water, decides to please her friend the goat, and come to stay on land? Your guess is as good as mine.                In the above illustration, the goat, and the fish were the focus....In today's illustration, you are our focus.                   Your life is made up of dreams, values, beliefs, aspirations. Though some of yours could look like that of someone else, the combination of them all is unique to you only.                 Just like that fish, we all get to meet some points of decision everyday